I Choose Bold - Coaching and Consulting

Dear Self,

I am going to take things slow and breathe deeply.

I am going to love on you just like I’d love my bestie.

I am going to open my heart to you and listen from there.

I am going to let go of any shame or blame. It’s covering up what I need to learn.

In uncovering, I discover parts of me I had never known.

So much to learn, to connect with and understand under this veil.

Some parts need to be seen, some need to be heard and some need healing.


I welcome all of you- the broken, the chipped and the healed.

I celebrate you, whole, as a woman, experiencing her life.

As I love you, I get to know you.

As I get to know you, I realign and rebuild.

I will not be unkind and unfair. I will support you.

I will take deep, full breaths and get into my body and away from the chatter of my ego mind.

I can slow down now to speed up later.

This is my time to just BE with you.

You're My Favorite!

Love, ME

I Choose Bold

Source: ichoosebold.com

Connected Heart #1

Journey Into Your Connected Heart

Hi, Heart Knowers.

Welcome to Connected Heart, a journey into the depths of your mind, body, heart, and soul.

Join us on an adventure that leads to connection, resilience, unleashing your full potential, and ultimately a return to Heart-Knowing.

Heart-Knowing is our natural state of well-being, worthiness, freedom, and love. Your journey to Heart -Knowing begins now!

Within each of us exists a Connected Heart, made up of 4 systems: the mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual aspects of ourselves.

These systems are how we translate our experiences in the world, and they are the basis for understanding all of life’s challenges.

Negative life experiences create blocks in these core systems keeping us from reaching our full potential.

Step into the journey of your Connected Heart and begin the exploration into each of your four core systems. Learn the healing ingredients of curiosity, compassion, vulnerability, and responsibility that assist you along the way, allowing you to return to Heart-Knowing.

We’re excited to have you on the journey! Let’s create a world of Connected Hearts together!

Until next time,

Love, Robin and Wendy

Connected Heart

Source: connectedheart.net

Teressa

My names Teressa, and I’m a grateful recovered drug addict. My struggle is part of my story, and I’m so grateful for my journey. It has made me the woman, mother, sister, daughter and friend that I am today. The tools of this program have enabled me to tap into an amazing power that gives me the ability to show up for others and myself.

 I don’t remember much of my childhood, but I do remember always feeling out of place. I was surrounded by drug and alcohol abuse growing up and its prevalence caused me to believe this way of life was normal. By eleven years old, I had adopted the same lifestyle as the adults around me. Drugs enabled me to face life and I assumed they would continue to be the central fact of my existence. They gave me strength, independence, security and confidence. However, Addiction is a progressive illness and it did not take long before I reached extreme lows. By age thirteen, I was taking pills, smoking weed, drinking and began smoking meth.

 After some consequences that landed me in a juvenile program, I entered my first 30 day residential treatment center.  I was able to stay off meth the following years of high school but supplemented with other drugs because I believed meth was the problem. What I didn’t understand at the time was that the drugs were in fact not my problem, they were my solution to my own internal condition. Yet the other drugs landed me in many more juvenile programs, caused me to repeatedly be expelled from school, and created issues at home.

 A big part of my story and another addiction I struggled with was selling drugs because I was obsessed with the lifestyle. I was seventeen when I left home to pursue an abusive relationship and was introduced to heroin.

 Once I started using heroin I felt like I had finally found my place. Through relationships ending and new ones starting, I hid my addiction from my family and friends for as long as I could. My deception came to a head when I couldn’t disguise it anymore.  I got honest with the father of my children after many legal consequences and started Suboxone for a few weeks until I got pregnant with my son.

 When my son was six months old, my mom went back to prison and I started using heroin again. I had tried to get sober for years - Methadone maintenance, treatment centers, relapse prevention plans, sober livings, I followed discharge plans, and for some reason I just could not stay sober. I truly believed I had to kill myself to end the cycle.

 God had other plans for me. I landed in a treatment center that actually sat me down, opened the big book and explained the truth behind step one. I felt a sense of relief that I didn’t think could happen. I was not alone. I was hopeless and doomed but there was a program that could give me freedom and all I had to do was put in the work. So, I did and though I’ve had some struggles sober, I’ve recovered from a hopeless state of mind and body.

 Today I am free. For the first time in my life I have begun to learn who I really am and begin to love myself. I’ve formed the most amazing relationships along the way and I work in my career field that I love. I’ve been able to show up as a mother to my kids and make up for time that I lost. Not only has my life blossomed but I get the opportunity to help others and take women through the same work that set me free. Watching women gain freedom for themselves and pass it on to others is truly a special experience. I’m so grateful for my spiritual life and the faith I’ve acquired along the way. I’m grateful for this program, the change that has occurred in my life and the ability to share my story.

Intro to 12-Steps

I’ve been asked to contribute an article on 12 Step Recovery for our monthly newsletter for the women of Grace Recovery ATX. There is so much I would like to share with you, it is difficult to know where to begin. It is my goal to provide information on 12 step recovery and share my experience on incorporating the 12 steps into my life, while maintaining anonymity which, according to the 12th Tradition of Alcoholics Anonymous, “is the spiritual foundation of all our Traditions”. (p. 562)

I choose to identify myself as a recovered alcoholic and recovered drug addict because I have experienced a “spiritual awakening” or if you will, a “psychic change” by working the 12 Steps out of the book, Alcoholics Anonymous, with the spiritual guidance of a female sponsor. I will not identify myself publicly as a member of any particular fellowship,( i.e. Alcoholics Anonymous, Cocaine Anonymous, Heroin Anonymous, Crystal Meth Anonymous.)

We at Grace Recovery ATX would be delighted to give you information about meetings, sponsorship or literature, or if you are interested about anything else about these spiritual programs of recovery! The great thing about Austin is that on any given day, multiple times a day, there are drug addicts and alcoholics meeting to share hope and solution about a new way of living. The aforementioned 12 Step fellowships also have websites detailing meeting locations and times, with 24-hour hotline services if you need to speak to another addict. Links will be included in this article.

In my own personal recovery, I see the Power of “the program” come to life when one practices the spiritual principles outlined in our text, rather than recite passages or give a personal interpretation of the words that were precisely executed in the 1930’s. The amazing thing to me is that the words in Alcoholics Anonymous are still relevant to my life and those of hundreds of thousands of others; young and old, black and white, alcoholic or drug addicted, around the world today, in 2018.

The “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous was written in 1939 by Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob Smith in 1939. It is believed Bill Wilson had his last drink on December 11, 1934 and the official founding date of Alcoholics Anonymous is June 10, 1935, the day of Dr. Bob’s last drink. It is important to note that AA identifies as a spiritual program, not a religious one, in case that deters anyone from participating. We will explore further in upcoming months exactly what that means. AA encourages and supports you to find a personal Higher Power through working the program as outlined in the text. We share our “experience, strength, and hope” and take other alcoholics and addicts through the work, as was done for us by those who came before us.

As I approach the anniversary of my 3rd “Birthday” in recovery this week, it is a natural time of reflection. It is a beautiful Fall Sunday evening. I’m sitting on the back porch at my home in Austin which I rent with two of my best women friends, who also work strong 12 step programs of their own. It has been a particularly chaotic week at work, followed by a high energy weekend with my nieces and nephews; full of kisses and questions, cupcakes and crocodile tears. The sun is setting over the hills. My roommate’s chihuahua, of whom I am particularly fond, is sniffing around the yard. A glass wind chime is delicately twinkling in the background. Sipping a steaming mug of ginger tea with honey, I am at peace. Grateful. This is heaven on Earth, in this moment. The 12 Steps have given me a life beyond my dreams. If you had known me 3 years ago, you would not doubt the presence of a Higher Power in my life today. If my life had continued the way it was headed, things were not going to end well. I was hopeless, a broken shell of the woman I was meant to be. Now, my life is full, and I have purpose and am surrounded by love, it is truly miraculous. I could not wish for anything more. I am truly grateful for the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.

I encourage you to be open minded as each month we explore different topics and relate them to 12 Step recovery. If you have questions or topic suggestions feel free to reach out to us at info@gracerecoveryatx.com See y’all next month! And don’t be afraid to reach out if you want a change! If it is possible for me, it is possible for anyone. Thank you for being a part of my journey!

Rebecca Frederick

Co-Founder Grace Recovery ATX

Sober since October 31, 2015

becca@gracerecoveryatx.com

 Alcoholics Anonymous,

 Fourth Edition, 2001. New York City,

ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS WORLD SERVICES, INC.

www.austinaa.org

www.ca-scta.org

www.heroinanonymous.org

www.crystalmeth.org

HOPE continued

HOPE
It is my responsibility to create my life. I have the power to make changes or to not. HOPE CAN BE BORN, because I allow it to be.

Growing up in a constant state of "fight or flight" has conditioned my body and my brain to feel normal when stressed.

I fight so desperately to heal, from what, I'm not sure. I just always knew, I felt broken. Through my attempts to heal I have learned there is not a finite point in one's life where, bam, you're healed. And although that is a very hard concept for my type A brain to process, it has become a building block throughout my healing journey. The healing process is and will always be forever changing, rebuilding and remolding, which is both my biggest nightmare and my biggest relief. It makes me HOPEful that I will heal.

One of my biggest challenges is to stay present in my moments. With mindfulness meaning to be aware of the present experience, with acceptance, that means I cannot judge and I have to turn off my thoughts. What!?!? That is next to impossible! I believe that if I am not being stressed, there is always more I can be doing. Remember, my brain is conditioned to think stress is normal. Taking on the task to live a more mindful life has given me a lot of Hope that I do not need to be stressed to think I am living up to my fullest potential.

I remind myself that to be mindful doesnt mean to sit in the dark, with no noises, and humming. It is a personal journey. For me it is not periods of formal practice, rather becoming mindful as a way of life is how I practice mindfulness. (At the end of this article you will find links to recommended Mindfulness literature and resources to get one started on their own personal mindfulness journey.)

To create who I am I realize, now, is an ongoing process. I remind myself, I am not my past, my history is not my destiny. Whatever got me to today, got me to today, and all I have guaranteed is, today.

Martin Buber is a master of living in the present. He says a way to tell yourself if you are being present is ask yourself:

1. Are you engaging in true I/Thou relationships?

2. Are you allowing meaning to exist in situations?

3. Are you being responsible for you here and now?

To Buber I/Thou means to not make a mistake of reducing relationships to mere objects. It is important to have I/It relationships in everyday life, however relationships that have meaning and purpose in your life must be looked upon with positive mutual respect.

Reducing meaningful relationships to mere objects can rob an individual of purpose and presence in their own life.

See the beauty in others and add to that beauty, in turn, beauty will be brought to your life.

Read more on Martin Buber’s thoughts on HOPE in his BOOK.

Meditation Now

Mindfulness for Life